I am a single woman. That’s what the mortgage on my construction loan says. I couldn’t help but laugh seeing that description behind my name when I signed those papers. But it was a sweet feeling to see it all spelled out. I am unattached, unmarried, a loner, free. I do not have to answer to anyone anymore, other than to my children. So now what?
What have I been doing since I entered the single scene? Well…I have been busy working at my new job, after seven months in, it feels more natural to me now. It has been an adjustment being a single mother of two children, balancing their needs, their school, my job and everything in between. As difficult as it is sometimes, I would gladly chose this life again instead of living with the nasty narcissist husband that ruled every aspect of my life.
As much as possible, I have been spending time with family, hanging out with dear friends, and trying to make new ones too. I have been busy writing my blog, running, and planning for my house. I have been pretty occupied when I think about it. I do not get much free time, but when I do, I still seem to find a way to fill it. I feel like I need to make the most of each second I get now. After wasting seven years of my life waiting to live on my terms, I don’t want to regret losing any time. But I need to remember that it is important to cherish my downtime too. I love that moment in the morning when the house is all quiet and I can just sit in silence and stare into my hot mug and smell the delicious aroma of my coffee steaming my face as I take each sip. These are the moments when my mind is completely still and the gears haven’t begun to spin. My favorite time of day.
I have always been in a hurry, I am type A as they say. But what this past year has taught me is that things don’t always go according to plan. My motto is “be prepared, be prepared.” But sometimes you cannot be prepared for what life throws at you. Learning how to roll with it is a vital skill to hone. Thus, I am practicing patience and trying my best to take life one day at a time. I look at all I have accomplished these past six months since my divorce was granted, and I am so proud of how I am handling my new life.
I have rekindled my love of music, which I withdrew from when I was married. I hardly ever turn on the TV anymore. I find that I much rather have a quiet house so I can read in the evenings or just be alone with my thoughts. I don’t need distractions anymore because I am comfortable in my own skin and with my decisions now. I finally feel content and happy. I have so much to be thankful for. So far, being a single woman has been a gratifying experience and I am enjoying figuring out who I am again.